Wednesday, December 24, 2008

YELP – Nuart Theatre (Los Angeles, CA)

I had one of the worst movie going experiences ever at this theater.  The night in question was a Q&A session with Bruce Campbell for his new movie "My Name is Bruce."  Sadly the horrible experience started many days before this.

My girl had stumbled upon this special night and wanted to snag some tickets.  She called the theater to confirm that Senor Campbell would indeed be doing the Q&A on this night during this particular viewing.  The guy over the phone was not only rude, but seemed bothered by her attempts to verify facts.  That should have been a warning, but knowing how dorktastic I am she continued procuring the tickets. 

The theater isn’t close (about 20 miles away) so I could only see us going out there for super special occasions such as this one.  3 highways later we finally arrived at the place.  To say the neighborhood looked a little rough is an understatement.  We circled several times looking for parking finally finding a dimly lit corner with no obvious “tow away” signs.

We were the last ones to get our tickets due to the lovely LA highways being a total bitch.  The ticket booth guy was nice and handed us the tickets quickly.  When we got to the front door it was locked.  From the concession stand a large disheveled man stomped toward us like the giant from “Jack & the Beanstalk.”  He opened the door but blocked our way in until we gave him the tickets.  It was a cold night and the least he could have done is let us warm ourselves while handing the tickets over.  It wasn’t like we were going to bum rush him to get into the place.  The entire time it felt like we were inconveniencing him by patronizing the establishment.  After passing the troll we slid into the theater to enjoy the film.

The movie was cheese, as was expected.  The fans were ok.  Some of them asked decent questions, but most of them behaved like they were touched in the head.  I truly feel bad for Bruce.  Once the somewhat depressing Q&A was finished everyone started leaving the theater.  Throngs of people made their way to the entrance so my girl and I patiently waited in our seats.  Just when the crowd began to ebb the same disheveled man got on the microphone barking a harsh “ALL NON-ESSENTIAL PERSONNEL NEED TO LEAVE IMMEDIATELY.”  Some folks giggled thinking he was joking, but soon saw the seriousness of his expression and the seething anger radiating from him.

With such an attitude from the moment we contacted them to the second the movie finished, there is no way in HELL that I’m ever returning to this theater.  They can show all the pretentious art-house crap they want, but I will NEVER spend another dime there.  I’m almost tempted to write off the entire chain, but that wouldn’t be fair to the rest of the organization.  With so many entertainment options available, indie film houses need to make themselves as inviting as possible to snag their customers.  This place did it’s damnedest to keep you the away and make you feel like crap.

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